quarta-feira, 20 de outubro de 2010

The Godfather in – Brokeback Mountain my ass…


Scene: the Godfather standing next to the barn, dressed in his full cowboy outfit… black vinyl, western, high hills, pointy Prada boots; western Lacoste silk shirt with mother pearl buttons; beaten up super extra/where are my balls tight western Diesel jeans; Hermes bandana around the neck and the usual long blond wig made up in a Dolly Parton hairdo.

- Vito! Where are you, you 2 tons pumpkin pie?
- Here sir!
- (slap) Haven’t I told yah to place the rhino in the fire early?
- Yes sir, but I was tending to the beer!
- Ok! (slap) is everything ready for tonight? The guests, Sunshine Santana and his entourage must be arriving any minute now!
- Yes sir! Except for the mud pool, all is in order!
- Great… fill up the pool… I want to see the “girls” playing all night!
- Yes sir!!!

Couple of hours later…

- Vito… (Whip in the but)!
- Who is that crazy queen singing “meteor of lust” with tighter jeans than mine?
- That is Sunshine Santana sir, the singing act you hired!
- (Whip) what the fuck? That much makeup would be enough for the whole cast of Gone With the Wind!
- Tell me about sir… and sir, when did you get the whip? I like it!
- (Slap, whip) Shut up you crazy cowgirl… this is for Sunshine, I was told he likes a little whip in the bedroom, if you know what I mean?!
- No sir, I don’t… but I hear it takes him 45 minutes just to take his pants off!
- Holy mad cow… I don’t think I can be sober that long! Oh, well… let us drink to another failed night in the Godfather’s barn!
- Well sir, not all is lost… here is a purple goat for you farm!
- And here is a fresh slap (slap) for your farm, what am I suppose to do with a goat?
- Well.. you know!
- No, I don’t… but give it here… who knows… I may get hungry later!
- Here you go sir...
- Thanks, And don’t forget to give Sunshine 50 bucks for the cab home!
- Yes Godfather, will do. Goodnight!

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