The Godfather – Divine Intervention

Scene: Hunting grounds at the Godfather’s estate. The Godfather in his full hunting outfit; high Prada boots, large hunting hat with a single peacock feather, a 12-gauge shotgun in one hand, a Prada camouflage bag on the other and his usual long blond wig covered with a Hermes scarf.

- Vito!

- Yes Godfather?

- Vito, have you spoken to Don Luvetta about the continuance of the Lindsay and the Pony book?

- Yes Godfather, and he asked me to tell you that he will not stop harassing you until it is finished.

- But Vito! (slap in the face) Did you make him an offer?

- Yes Sir, nonetheless he was very determined about it. He told me that only the book or some Divine intervention will make him shut up about it.

- Vito (slap in the face), no one threatens Don Godfather!

- Yes Godfather, but he is a very popular Don and you know how he can be very stubborn, especially in the absence of Miss Anna H. Luvetta.

- Divine intervention! He will experience my Divine intervention once and for all!

- Yes Godfather!

- Vito! Go to Don Luvetta’s house and bring me Texugo!

- But Godfather, that is his loving award-winning salsa-dancing pet? How can you think of such a thing?

- Vito (slap in the face), do not argue with me. I am the Godfather.

- Yes Godfather, right away sir.

(…Couple of hours later…)

- Vito (slap in the face), what took you so long?

- I am sorry Godfather, but you have no idea how hard it is to shove a 300-pound pig in the back of a VW Bug!

- Vito (slap in the face), I do know! Haven’t I done that with you countless times?

- Yes Godfather. And what shall we do with him?

- Vito! Take him to the barn. I will decide what to do in the morning.

- Yes Godfather.

- And Vito (slap in the face), this is for having me do such despicable things.

- Yes Godfather.